Saturday, January 28, 2017
Mom's tips to her teenage daughter on how to deal with bullying.
Bullies: What is it about them that makes it almost impossible to deal with?
They prey on our attributes and make us believe those attributes are our weaknesses, mistakes and even some kind of deformity... ouch! Not a very nice positive way to approach another person. For sure not healthy and most certainly not a way to create a friendship.
This type of aggressive behavior makes them intolerable, dangerous and when they persist on attacking us they can make a great deal of damage to our self-esteem.
So why do they act the way they do?
* Bullies often lack warm, caring and involved parents.
* Bullies usually lack consistent discipline at home.
* As children they usually feel isolated and feel disliked by their peers and their parents and they resort to bullying to gain some sort of social control.
* Many times bullies had been physically abused by their parents.
* They have been bullied at another time.
* They struggle to fit in, have very low self-esteem and often times are ridiculed by their own family members.
The most important thing to do is not to engage with them and ignore their threats. If possible avoid any encounter at all. So how we disengage with the minimum confrontation?
* Stand up for yourself, show yourself in a brave and confident way. Say "No! Stop it!" in a loud voice and then walk away.
* Don't bully back, it only makes it worst and it might even make things escalate into a physical situation that you really need to avoid.
* Tell an adult about the situation. Always reach out for an adult with an authority who can control the situation, also tell your parents and find together the best way to come to a solution.